Wednesday, June 04, 2008

30

In approximately 2 hours, I will be 30 years old. 

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about where I am in my life, where I've been, and where I'm headed. In reviewing my life, I've realized that all of the major decisions I have made in my adult life have been based on one (or more) of three things: job, relationship, and/or location. I moved to Boulder after college because of the location (not Boston or NYC) and my relationship. I moved to San Francisco because of the location and my friendships there. And I moved to Boston because of a "job" (school) and its location (closer to family). 

For the first time in my adult life, I am finding myself completely at a loss for what to do next. Though I have a degree in a field about which I am passionate, I don't yet have a job. I don't have a significant other with whom to consider potential future plans. And though I do enjoy living in Boston, I don't feel particularly tied to this place. It is an interesting position for me to be in, and one that has left me feeling both excited and overwhelmed.

So now, on the eve of my 30th birthday, I look back at my accomplishments thus far, and look ahead to all that awaits me. I think of how right the decision to return to school felt, and trust that other such major decisions will also feel so good and right. I trust that despite often feeling as though I will never find someone with whom I can share my life, there is in fact such a person out there to be found, and I look forward to finding him. I trust that despite not getting the fellowship I thought was made for me, over the next few months a new path will become clear, and I look forward to discovering where that path leads. And I trust that the next 30 years will be filled with just as much joy and laughter and challenge as the past 30, and I look forward to sharing that joy and laughter and challenge with friends and family, old and new.

6 comments:

Pete said...

A-men, Sister.

Or, A-not-men?

Now might be a perfect time to take a summer and travel--or volunteer for a presidential nominee?

Expect a phone call soon!

smukai said...

Big hugs!

GirlTuesday said...

happy day, f. looking forward to celebrating with you in style this weekend. x/o/x

Tim & M said...

Hi Birthday Twin. Sorry I'm a little late. Hope you had a great day. Here's to 30 years of adventure, discovery and joy. May the next 30 years bring much happiness.
Love from Meraiah

Rosalie Reibel said...

SF hearts Phoebe!!!

Anonymous said...

Perhaps you should move to Vermont...